This post has been rolling around in my head for a while now. As much "gumption" as some of you think I might have, I admit I have been hesitant to pull the trigger on this one. I want to make it very clear that this is not about any one ministry in particular, or indictment against any specific church. God has blessed me in some observational and deep thinking skills, and has brought this at the forefront of my mind. I know He must really want it out there, because the more I delay writing and posting it, the more it weighs on me. I offer this up, hoping it will move the discourse in a positive direction.
Having just finished out an exhausting three years of orphan care ministry, largely with limited success within a large evangelical church, I feel like I have some perspective on this topic. As a ministry we tried big massive city-wide events. We tried small discussion forums. We tried short small group lessons. We tried partnerships. We tried photo galleries. We tried prayer days. We tried, well, just about everything. Meanwhile, I saw other churches in Austin with growing, flourishing ministries. What was the difference?
Why do orphan care ministries within churches fail so often? Why do some flourish and others flounder? Is it the leadership, the dollars, the creativity of the team, what? Why do the ones that make less impact fail to capture the hearts and minds of congregants when, clearly, caring for orphans and the oppressed is so central to the heart and mind of God?
If our adoption, arguably the most radical adoption initiative ever, was the purpose of our redemption, made possible through the death and resurrection of Jesus, then God is the ultimate orphan care leader. We know He is the ultimate father, for through our adoption, through our son ship, we not only call him Abba, but we also stand as coheirs next to Jesus, our older brother.
And just in case we miss all that theology, He made sure to record all His feelings towards orphans, the fatherless, the oppressed, the refugee, the widow, and the migrant down for us in the bible so that we could all be really clear.
So we all KNOW. We do. We know we are supposed to care. That's not the issue.
The challenge is, that participating in orphan care ministries is hard.
It takes time.
It sucks away your physical energy.
It sucks away your emotional energy.
It can suck away your money.
It's lonely.
If you engage in it, you will miss out on other social events (see the other above points on reasons why).
Orphan care is not about coming to event on a Saturday and volunteering for a couple of hours. Orphan care is not about making baggies of hygiene items to send overseas. Orphan care is not about sending shoes to kids in South America that need them.
Orphan care is not about you.
Orphan care is not about making you feel like you have served, have made a difference, or accomplished something.
Orphan care is not something you can do on a weekend.
Orphan care is not about the church being a buffer between the congregation and the orphan. A drop-point, if you will, for old clothes and bags.
Orphan care is about so much more.
Orphan care requires fundamentally changing who we are as people, what our hearts are after, so that we can invest in relationship building with children who desperately need relationships.
Shoes, while helpful to protect a child's feet, won't heal the heart of a boy abandoned by his mother and father. That boy needs relationship. With his heavenly Father, but with an earthly one as well.
Clothes, while they keep the children warm, don't keep the nightmares at bay for the kids in foster care that desperately want forever families.
1. Orphan care ministries fail when churches have a quick fix mentality, or define success by numbers. Churches must be willing to do the hard slow work of fundamental transformation in order to be ready to engage in the messiness of orphan care.
Because orphan care is nothing if not messy, slow, and transformative.
But its good. So, so, good.
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