Lent

I grew up in the Catholic church where Lent was an annual time of fasting, meditation, reflection, and quietness before Easter. It was a time when people often gave something up in order to more fully understand sacrifice, to bring us closer to Christ up on the cross.

This year I wanted to spend the Lenten season in an extended time of meditation and prayer, a season to be broken for the things in my life that break God's heart. I spend most of my time outward focused, either on my family or on ministry, and I wanted Lent to be about just me and God. Sin, weakness, direction, beauty, I wanted God to show me all of it.

The thing about those kinds of prayers, though, the really deep refining ones, is that those are the ones God is 100% of the time going to answer. I swear. He never doesn't show up for those.

I started with an old litany - the litany of humility. Guided prayers aren't usually my thing, but I find that they can be helpful to lead my heart where I want it to go when it is not fully ready to go there on its own. They also keep me focused and on track. I tend to wander.

Here it is:

"O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, Jesus.
That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be praised and I unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it."

It is slow progress, and God is gracious to reveal my strongholds slowly to me.

Got anything going on for Lent this year? Want to share? Have you been following Gavin Rogers? He gave up his house for Lent. I kind want to go down to SA and talk to him :)